i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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