Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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