Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I need a burrito and a hug.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
