If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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