I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
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They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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