I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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