Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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