Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
