Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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