Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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