every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
