did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
