Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
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