So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
