we're blogging at a bar
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
