apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
