Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Randomize
