i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
