we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
