I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
