He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
