seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
