I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Damn victory sex feels great
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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