They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
