Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize