remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize