I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
