i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
