I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
