Ambien. No doubt about it.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?