i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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