I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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