we have officially lost it.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
