Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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