These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
where are you?
Hypothermia
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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