My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
