i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
