i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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