There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
