windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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