If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Randomize
