I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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