I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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