sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
