Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
