I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
