Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We named our party play list daddy issues
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
