Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
