you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
