If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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